12/23/08

its almost midnight, and im still thinking about what happened a few hours ago
and at this point
i hate everything, and feel stupid
i feel stupid for loving a friend that treats me like shit
i feel stupid for letting her take advantage of me
i feel stupid for explaining why i think of her as a best friend
i feel stupid for allowing her to use me
i feel stupid for backing her up
i feel stupid for lying for her
i feel stupid for letting her step on me
i feel stupid for feeling like this
i feel stupid for keeping my feelings inside
i feel stupid for letting my feelings out like i did
i feel stupid for not mentioning this sooner
i feel stupid for trusting her, and have her let ppl in our business
i feel stupid for pretending everything was okay
i feel stupid for getting emotional
i feel stupid for my lack of control to stop crying like a bitch
i feel stupid for not knowing what i want to do next
i feel stupid for being so nice
i feel stupid for always apologizing
i feel stupid for laughing at everything
i feel stupid for writing all this down on the blog
i feel stupid for wasting my time cause no one reads my stupid blogs
i feel stupid for making myself feel worse
i feel stupid for having all these memories with her around my room
i feel stupid for tearing up at every memory i see
i feel stupid for letting this argument happen
i feel stupid for tryna hide how i feel about the incident for half the day
i feel stupid for pouring my heart out to my kind friends, and having them feel bad for me
i feel stupid for letting a friend try to help us
i feel stupid for doing this blog, cause ill most likely delete it later
i feel stupid cause i have so much more to say, but i feel this is pointless
i adore yennie and marifel for making me laugh, and forget about what happened for a few minutes
i love william and andrea for trying to make me feel better
i like these cheesy pick-up lines he sent me:
Did the sun come out or did you just smile at me?
I think I can die happy now, cause I've just seen a piece of heaven.
What's that on your face? Oh, must just be beauty. Here, let me get it off. Hey, it's not coming off!
[00:11] William Chyy: Jaddis...
[00:11] jaddisyyy: yeah?
[00:12] William Chyy: you smell
[00:12] William Chyy: lets take a shower together
00:13] William Chyy: come on.. am i not making u laugh at all!??!
[00:13] William Chyy: or any better?
[00:13] William Chyy: im like searchin on yahoo " how to make someone feel better"
[00:13] William Chyy: "how to cheer someone up"
and he made this one up himself!
[00:15] William Chyy: imma be up until u go down with me
i like that the best, cause it came from his heart